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'Let your love show, it's the season'

I like humming a tune. Sometimes I don't even realize I am singing. Once, I guess I was getting a little carried away and some lady told me I "must be really happy today." I took it as a slam, as she was casting crusty looks at me like I was bread that needed to be baked.

I told her I wasn't particularly happier than any other day and apologized for singing.

I apologized for singing. One of those regrets that don't mean much more than principal. But no one should ever apologize for having a song in their heart and letting it show.

The song I was singing was 'Let your love show' by the Bellamy Brothers.

"There's a reason for the sunshine sky and there's a reason why I'm feelin' so high must be the season when that love light shines all around us. So let that feelin' grab you deep inside and send you reelin' where your love can't hide...Just let your love flow like a mountain stream and let your love grow with the smallest of dreams and let your love show and you'll know what I mean."

Even going through life with a song in your heart, you sometimes get a glimpse of how things could be.

Should be. Ought to be.

Sometimes you are sad at the sight, sometimes you smile and thank the powers that be for the reality instead of the vision.

I never met Abraham Lincoln. I know I am old, but not that old. However, I still count him as one of my favorite President's. He seemed to me to be fair, moderately minded and had his fair share of heartache.

His first love died at 22, typhoid they say. Good old Abe rebounded and met another charming young girl. She even moved to a different town for him. But, something was off, and shortly a 'Dear Mary' letter was sent and after Abe had no reply, another love was lost.

Abe was not one to give up. Many of his quotes reflect his perseverance and strong will.

Along comes Mary Todd. Wealthy and likeable enough, Abe sets his sights on a relationship. But after a year of courtship and setting a wedding date, Abe backs out. We all know how the story ends. Mary and Abe finally get married, have four boys and later move into the most recognized house in the country.

But what if that wasn't how it should have been. On paper it looks as though the trials and heartaches that find Abe and Mary greatly outnumber the victories.

All but one of their sons dies, the one remaining son struggles with depression. Abe is killed when he takes Mary out on a date to the theatre and she struggles the rest of her life with depression.

Remember the famous line, "Your husband is dead. Other than that Mrs. Lincoln, how was the theatre."

Knowing the chances of failure, do we act as risk assessors and weigh out the chance of death and depression versus going down in history as one of the most beloved and successful presidents of our country?

Most of us can't see into the future. We don't know what will or won't happen if we don't marry or do marry someone. We don't know if we will catch the golden ring even when we, like Abe, lack powerful friends, money and education but have the will to change our country.

There is this man I see occasionally. He is sort of one of those blend-in types. No one notices him much, I guess. Normal enough looking, well dressed but no reason to stand out to anyone it seems.

Except to me. He walks with a limp.

Before we lost my son's leg, while going through treatments and surgeries to save it, the doctors gave my son a "lift" for his shoe. So he wouldn't walk with a limp. He was embarrassed because his shoe looked different than the other. And 'different' is big stuff to a second grader. The doctors convinced him it was important and if he didn't wear this now he would always walk with a limp.

Every time I see that man, I wonder why he never got a 'lift.' Maybe his limp is temporary, but after seeing him for over three years, I tend to think it's here to stay.

We drive a lot, the kids and I. We are either on the road to a game, practice, doctors appointment, over the hill to see big brother, or simply down the road to home. One of the kids' favorite games is "What if." They ask questions like "what if uncle Darin didn't die," "what if daddy didn't leave," "what if I still had my leg."

The grounded-to-reality 10-year-old usually breaks in before his sisters get too far down the lane of impossible and says this thinking doesn't matter.

Maybe it doesn't. But we all do it. Maybe our mistakes, failures and bad luck isn't meant to always be kept in a small box at the back of the closet. Maybe it's good to pull it out and assess where we went wrong.

Maybe not to the degree of making us risk assessment experts. But wouldn't you want to know you were on a path to destruction before the first step? Know it's a bad play before buying the ticket?

An argument I like better is that life is not black or white. It's not all death, assassination and war. It's about falling in love and changing the world and compromises.

This Valentine's Day, act the way your heart tells you. If your love is 10 days or 100 years old, let the heart guide you, never mind the consequence. But by all means, let your love show!

 

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